Post by Sivoncé™ on Jul 5, 2009 21:05:22 GMT -5
Idk =[
I'm not mad...really it's the opposite. I'm very hurt and very upset.
I work my butt off, guys. I try to be welcoming, I post as much as I can, try and get on every day. I really really do my best. I tried to do something special for the anniversary and I try and do fun things with the plot but I'm just...I'm all worn out. Nobody cares! It doesn't matter if I try hard to do stuff like make the site look good or advertise or remember the anniversary or keep the plot going, heck, it doesn't even matter if I post or not. Whenever I come here I work so. freaking. hard. And nobody has a clue! It's not easy doing all of this stuff, it's time consuming and I put a lot of thought into it. It's your choice if you want to participate or not, but please don't be patronizing about it.
Like I said, I'm not pissed. I'm extremely hurt. Kinda offended.
I know I'm a good writer. Not the best, but I have some skills and I want to put them to use somewhere where I get appreciated. Maybe sometimes it doesn't seem like it, but it really makes my day when two random people start up open threads or keep it going or something, when it's not just me or Wolfie or someone who's been here forever, when newbies and oldies and everyone in between just does stuff for the heck of it. They do it because they want to, not because I harp on them.
I've felt this way for the most of this year...and I don't want to do it anymore. Forget the vids, I'm not making them. I came back maybe hoping that somebody did something, that somebody actually wanted to write besides the usual few.....not mad...just....enormously disappointed. I've been disappointed for a long time and...I don't need stress like this is my life. I loved this place when it first started out because nobody had to stop and ask "oh, is this good enough?" they just wrote and ran with it and everybody's minds were working. We didn't even use the word 'muse' on here until after the first plot. If you want to write...you can't always wait for inspiration to hit you. Sometimes, you just have to roll with it. It's not always magical like BAM 'this is what's supposed to happen'. I get what it's like to be blocked and not have ideas, I do, but it's not fair to blame the site itself for this. Sometimes, you just get blocked. It's not your fault, and it's not mine or anyone else's on here. It's natural. It happens. And WotM should not be blamed for it.
I don't really know how to say what I want to say except for...after two years of slaving away here, I don't know what people want to see change. I can't do it. You have to do it yourselves. I can't fix it all for you. I did my best, and I feel like there's only a handful of people that see that.
I need some space...I need a lot of it. I'll check in and probably post but not today...most likely in the next day or two. I really appreciate those who did stuff for the anniversary, those who have been working with me on plot, all the staffers, everyone who's been upbeat...but I'm...breathless. Just....majorly hurt....was not expecting to be this let down all over again.
-Sivvy
For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, disregard this.
For those of you who say stuff like "oh, well this place has just gotten worse in this past year" or "well that really wasn't that great...".....I will not get mad. I will not yell and/or use inappropriate language...I guess I'll just say get off your butts and let me see you do something better. Let me see you step into my place and do it better. Quite frankly, I don't think you would be able to...I know you wouldn't. You both know who you are. There's a difference between having an opinion and being nasty. What you said was nasty.
or the select individuals who do know what I'm talking about, I am not happy at all. Take a look around you. I was gone on the anniversary, so were quite a few people, and we did do something. We do work hard. I've heard your complaints about underappreciation. This is where the rule "Do to others what you would have done to you" comes in.
I'm not mad...really it's the opposite. I'm very hurt and very upset.
I work my butt off, guys. I try to be welcoming, I post as much as I can, try and get on every day. I really really do my best. I tried to do something special for the anniversary and I try and do fun things with the plot but I'm just...I'm all worn out. Nobody cares! It doesn't matter if I try hard to do stuff like make the site look good or advertise or remember the anniversary or keep the plot going, heck, it doesn't even matter if I post or not. Whenever I come here I work so. freaking. hard. And nobody has a clue! It's not easy doing all of this stuff, it's time consuming and I put a lot of thought into it. It's your choice if you want to participate or not, but please don't be patronizing about it.
Like I said, I'm not pissed. I'm extremely hurt. Kinda offended.
I know I'm a good writer. Not the best, but I have some skills and I want to put them to use somewhere where I get appreciated. Maybe sometimes it doesn't seem like it, but it really makes my day when two random people start up open threads or keep it going or something, when it's not just me or Wolfie or someone who's been here forever, when newbies and oldies and everyone in between just does stuff for the heck of it. They do it because they want to, not because I harp on them.
I've felt this way for the most of this year...and I don't want to do it anymore. Forget the vids, I'm not making them. I came back maybe hoping that somebody did something, that somebody actually wanted to write besides the usual few.....not mad...just....enormously disappointed. I've been disappointed for a long time and...I don't need stress like this is my life. I loved this place when it first started out because nobody had to stop and ask "oh, is this good enough?" they just wrote and ran with it and everybody's minds were working. We didn't even use the word 'muse' on here until after the first plot. If you want to write...you can't always wait for inspiration to hit you. Sometimes, you just have to roll with it. It's not always magical like BAM 'this is what's supposed to happen'. I get what it's like to be blocked and not have ideas, I do, but it's not fair to blame the site itself for this. Sometimes, you just get blocked. It's not your fault, and it's not mine or anyone else's on here. It's natural. It happens. And WotM should not be blamed for it.
I don't really know how to say what I want to say except for...after two years of slaving away here, I don't know what people want to see change. I can't do it. You have to do it yourselves. I can't fix it all for you. I did my best, and I feel like there's only a handful of people that see that.
I need some space...I need a lot of it. I'll check in and probably post but not today...most likely in the next day or two. I really appreciate those who did stuff for the anniversary, those who have been working with me on plot, all the staffers, everyone who's been upbeat...but I'm...breathless. Just....majorly hurt....was not expecting to be this let down all over again.
-Sivvy
For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, disregard this.
For those of you who say stuff like "oh, well this place has just gotten worse in this past year" or "well that really wasn't that great...".....I will not get mad. I will not yell and/or use inappropriate language...I guess I'll just say get off your butts and let me see you do something better. Let me see you step into my place and do it better. Quite frankly, I don't think you would be able to...I know you wouldn't. You both know who you are. There's a difference between having an opinion and being nasty. What you said was nasty.
or the select individuals who do know what I'm talking about, I am not happy at all. Take a look around you. I was gone on the anniversary, so were quite a few people, and we did do something. We do work hard. I've heard your complaints about underappreciation. This is where the rule "Do to others what you would have done to you" comes in.
